Archive for December, 2017

Stoopid Kardz
Welcomes You!

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Any time a new web page goes up or you get to a landing page, it always says, “Welcome To…
(fill in the thing of your choice). We didn’t want to do that because we think it’s a big
fat cliché. “Welcome to this, welcome to that,” shut up already. But our marketing pros
insisted on it. What we wanted to say was:
Stoopid Kardz® – In Your Face! (In a good way.)
Either way, here we are! Move over, wimpy, normal cards. “Kardz” are born. The “K” is for
“krap” and the “Z” is for “zebra” (What else? Didn’t you have alphabet books when you
were a kid? “Z” is always for Zebra) That’s what makes Stoopid Kardz® different (Zebras?…
wait…never mind).
So, then we came up with another FANTASTIC one! Our tagline was going to be:
“Stoopid Kardz® — Even Our Moms Think They Suck!”
But the marketing pros (Nancy, Geoffrey, Mary, Larry and Fern) advised (strongly) against
it. We said, “Oh, you wanna throw down, Bro? You think you marketing geeks can come up
with something better, you marketing monkey-brains?” and they were like, “Uh..yeah! That’s
what you hired us for, duh-h-h. So let us do our frikkin’ jobs!”
So we did. And they came up with something way better:
“ Stoopid Kardz® — quite possibly the rudest, most outrageous, tasteless and
gloriously inappropriate greeting cards on the planet.”
Then we fired them for being such know-it-all a-holes. But their tagline rings true – just take a
look at the 60-second video to see how people (the ones that gave us permission to show them
on camera; all you others can get bent) react to a Stoopid Kard when they seem’ em for the
first time.
Visit the web site at to see them all!
There’s no cliché welcome thing there.